It’s gets to be too much work to write a blog post for every stupid thing someone says or does that just annoys me. Rather than that, since I would rather work on other topic, I would like to do a column on who I think needs to take a seat, and be quiet. So, here goes the first edition:
1. President Barack Obama: I know things were not going to go well with his first trip to Africa, since he’s ignored them for about six years. So Obama tells Africans to stop blaming colonialism for their troubles a few years ago. Now Professor President BHO tells them Africans over there that their culture is backwater and they need to join modern neoliberalism and make marriage a social marker for economic success for everyone. Obama’s colonizing gaze is just more of the same Wilsonian imperialist progressivism, and it flatly ignores American archconservative Christian involvement in Uganda. To this, I say to BHO, the gluteus maximus, meet the chair. Take a seat, sir! Have several of them.
2. Rick Perry was not alone in staying in the headlines in Texas politics, but I am going to have to advise him and his buddy Lieutenant David Dewhurst to find a chair, take a seat, please. No disrespect. Why? Just cuz.
3. The white people and white conservative talking heads making fun of Rachel Jeantel. She speaks three languages. Hannity? O’Reilly? College and high school dropouts. These are the same white people who have given us Honey Boo Boo, Moonshiners, and Duck Dynasty? really? really? HAVE A SEAT AND TAKE AS MANY AS YOU NEED PLEASE!
4. Paula Deen Supporters crying foul. Look, the government nor Black Twitter had nothing to do with your heroine’s downfall. The free market took care of her. Take your crocodile tears and place your bottom in a chair, mouths closed. Thanks. Kay. Goodbye.
5. So-called social justice advocates who were rejoicing over the Supreme Court’s rulings on Prop 8 and DOMA. Look, the DOMA case just proves my point that marriage is an economic arrangement, the part of DOMA that was rejected was about BENEFITS not anything about the nature of sexuality or whatever. But anyhow, SCOTUS on Monday struck down a key provision of the Voting Rights Act, and it didn’t take long for the relevant states to start more voter suppression . So, for all those silent “allies’ out there, I want ya’ll to take a seat in the corner, in timeout. You need it.